.Editor's Note: The adhering to is actually the text of a character coming from Expedition Three Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), assessing the celebrations of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I have not composed very much regarding specifics of this particular objective throughout the month I have actually been actually right here, mostly for 2 reasons: the initial being that there has been really little time to accomplish that type of creating, and also also because I'm uncertain how pleasant I am discussing ideas I show to friends and family along with the rest of the planet.Properly, certainly the globe modified today. What I point out or carry out is really slight reviewed to the value of what occurred to our nation today when it was struck through ... by whom? Revolutionaries is all we understand, I guess. Hard to understand at whom to guide our rage and also anxiety ...I had actually only completed an amount of activities this morning, the absolute most lengthy being the physical exams of all crew members. In an exclusive talk following that, the tour cosmetic surgeon told me they were having an incredibly bad time on the ground. I had no idea ...He illustrated the condition to me as finest he recognized it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually astonished, then horrified. My initial idea was that this wasn't a genuine chat, that I was actually still listening closely to among my Tom Clancy tapes. It just failed to seem to be achievable on this incrustation in our nation. I couldn't also visualize the particulars, also just before the news of further devastation started being available in.Vladimir came over fairly rapidly, noticing that one thing incredibly significant was actually being covered. I swung Michael in to the module as well. They were also astounded and stunned. After our team authorized off, I attempted to detail to Vladimir as well as Michael as greatest I might the potential immensity of the show of terror in midtown Manhattan as well as at the Government. They accurately recognized and were incredibly considerate.I browsed the Planet Chart on the pc to view where over the world our team were actually as well as discovered that we were actually coming southeast out of Canada and also would be passing over New England in a handful of mins. I whized around the terminal till I discovered a home window that would offer me a view of NYC as well as nabbed the nearest electronic camera. It occurred to become a camera, and also I was actually looking south from the home window of Michael's cabin.The smoke seemed to be to possess a strange blossom to it at the bottom of the column that was streaming south of the area. After checking out one of the newspaper article our company merely obtained, I feel we were actually looking at NY around the time of, or even soon after, the crash of the second high rise. Exactly how unpleasant ...I scanned the camera during the East Shore to the south to find if I can view every other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or anywhere else, but absolutely nothing showed up.It was actually fairly complicated to think of job afterwards, though our experts possessed some to do, however on the following track our company went across the US additional southern. All three people were operating one or two electronic cameras to try to obtain scenery of Nyc or Washington. There was actually fog over Washington, but no certain source could be seen. All of it looked awesome coming from a couple of hundred miles away. I can not picture the terrible scenes on the ground.Besides the mental impact of our nation being actually dealt with and also hundreds of our citizens and also maybe some good friends being gotten rid of, the absolute most difficult feeling being where I am is one of solitude.Following time ... I suspect the fatigue and mental stress obtained the most effective of me. I could not remain awake and remain to compose. Today was actually still difficult, but our company began getting additional details, plus we possessed the tribute of speaking straight along with the Facility Director, Roy Estess, who ensured our company that the ground crews will remain to work as well as ensure our safety and security, as well as the secure procedure of the Place. Our team also heard from our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, that added that the companions in the Program are actually all entirely devoted to proceeding safe functions and assistance. These were actually never ever concerns for me. I know all these people! The ground groups have actually been actually surprisingly helpful, incredibly understanding of the effect of the headlines, and have actually made an effort to be as helpful as possible. They have all been actually extremely qualified and centered though I can not envision the disturbance of the form of headlines can be found in and the idea that federal government buildings might be vulnerable. They never ever bypassed a beat, also when relocating control centers. And also a group of senior workers as well as good friends provided us a fairly extensive rundown on what was understood and also what was actually being done in the authorities as well as at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was actually really helpful and also type of them to accomplish in the middle of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has also been supporting and also handy, making an effort to uplink newspaper article when our personal resources were inoperable, as well as stating kind words ...My crewmates have actually been actually excellent, also. They understand it's been a challenging day for me as well as the individuals on the ground, as well as they have actually tried to become as even keeled and also helpful as possible. Michael even corrected me my favored Borscht soup for dinner. As well as they offer me plenty of area to think when I required it. They are quite compassionate and also naturally shocked at whoever would do this.I understand so many folks in Washington, numerous folks that travel to DC as well as NYC, plenty of who are actually pilots, that I felt sure I will receive at least a handful of items of trouble over the following few days. I acquired the first one today when I learned that the Leader of the American Airlines plane that hit the Government was Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I found Chic during the course of cadet summer when we resided in the D&B with each other, and also our experts possessed considerable amounts of classes together. I can't envision what he should of looked at, as well as now I listen to that he may have increased additionally than our experts may also think about by perhaps avoiding his aircraft coming from being actually the one to attack the White Property. What a terrible loss, yet I'm sure Chic was combating fearlessly throughout. And splits don't circulate the same precede ...It is actually challenging to describe how it experiences to become the only United States fully off the world at a time including this. The emotion that I ought to exist along with each of you, coping with this, helping somehow, is mind-boggling. I know that our experts perform the threshold (or even past) of a dreadful shift in the past history of the world. Lots of things will certainly never coincide again after September 11, 2001. Not merely for the thousands and also lots of folks directly had an effect on through these ghastly process of terrorism, but most likely for everybody. Our experts will certainly locate ourselves really feeling in different ways regarding lots of factors, featuring possibly area expedition, however.It's unpleasant to find smoke cigarettes pouring from cuts in your own country coming from such a great vantage point. The duality of being on a space probe devoted to strengthening live on the planet as well as enjoying lifestyle being actually destroyed by such willful, dreadful acts is jolting to the mind, no matter that you are. As well as the knowledge that every little thing are going to be actually various than when our company introduced by the opportunity our company land is actually a little bit of disconcerting. I believe in our nation as well as in our management that our experts will definitely do every thing possible to much better guard her and our families, and also to bring fair treatment wherefore has actually been done. I have assurance that the really good folks at NASA will certainly do every thing essential to proceed our mission carefully as well as return our team safely at the correct time. As well as I miss out on every one of you quite. I can't be there with you in person, and our experts have a long way to visit finish our objective, but be actually specific that my heart is along with you, and also know you reside in my prayers.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the final character ... Luckily, it is actually been an active full week up below. And to prove that, like our nation, our company are continuing our designated path with organization customarily (as much as possible). Tonight the most up to date add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Chamber are going to be actually released from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday night (US time), it will dock with us, at a port never ever utilized prior to on the nadir edge of the Service Element. This brand new module will definitely provide us an additional spot to dock an Improvement or Soyuz and also are going to supply a huge airlock along with 2 useable hatches for administering EVA's in Russian Orlan satisfies, which we will carry out a few of prior to our team return.The problem just before in managing today was inadequate headlines. The problem right now is actually way too much. It arrived simultaneously when e-mail was recovered, as well as there is actually insufficient time to review everything! Plus it's too tough to cope with all of it at the same time. But I value receiving it, and also I really value the terrific characters of support as well as friendship I am actually getting.We are flourishing aboard, receiving our job done, and also discussing points. Last evening our company had a lengthy conversation over dinner about the importance of these celebrations, the possible actions to comply with, as well as what must be carried out. After dinner, Michael challenged informing me that every e-mail he received from good friends in Russia mentioned particularly to inform me how regretful they were that this occurred, prolonging their acknowledgements, and also asking how I was doing. Vladimir showed me the Russian phrase for "acknowledgements" after talking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Star Urban area. (Both the Russian and also the English phrases are actually considerably too long to verbalize effortlessly.) Incredibly type individuals.For the last two times, the Russian MCC has been good enough to send real-time broadcasts of broadcast news concerning the occasion as well as affiliated stories, to be sure I was well updated. Every expert who has begun free throw line to explain a treatment or a complication has at some factor prolonged greetings to me along with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom informed our team that because of the wedding of remembrance in the United States, throughout the day folks had been taking blooms and edging all the wall surfaces of the US consulate in Moscow, and this night they were actually lighting candles in the street outside the consulate. Just how the globe has actually modified.Individuals everywhere seem to recognize the senselessness as well as horror in this particular attack. As well as the incredible reduction. Moscow has managed these kind of concerns in the final couple of years along with condo as well as metro battles, so they are as anxious to eliminate this hazard as our experts are. Yet the bottom collection is that there are excellent folks just about everywhere that wish to live in tranquility. I read through that a little one asked, "America is actually so really good to various other countries, we regularly aid everybody, how can they detest our team a lot?".I wish the instance of collaboration as well as trust that this spacecraft and all people in the course display daily are going to sooner or later encourage the rest of the world to function the same way. They must!Sadly, our experts won't be actually flighting over the United States while individuals are lighting candlesticks. Don't understand if our company can see that anyway. Our team did, nevertheless, find an extremely uncommon and also wonderful sight a couple of moments ago: the launch of our Docking Chamber on a Soyuz enhancer. Our company were eclipsing it and also it appeared concerning three minutes after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sunlight attacked our terminal, so it was still in the dark. It appeared like a huge comet with a right, broad rear silhouetted against the darker earth beneath. Even with some negative lighting for some time as the sun hit our home window at a reduced perspective, I handled some video clip of it as first our team passed the spacecraft, and after that enjoyed it begin to catch up as it acquired elevation and also speed. I recorded up until primary engine deadline as well as enhancer separation happened equally our experts came close to dawn on the Mountain ranges. A remarkable sight in a memorable week ...Life happens, also precede. Our team are actually here to stay ... Frank.